After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
