Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
