I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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