PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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