he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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