So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
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