So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
