she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize