What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize