Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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