Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
