You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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