make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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