just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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