just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Randomize