it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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