In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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