Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I forgot wine drunk hurts
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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