i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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