As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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