after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
