Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize