You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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