Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize