CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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