i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize