Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Randomize