I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Randomize
