I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
