So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Blood and glitter go together right?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
