Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
