i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
