he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
