i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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