Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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