yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
