who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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