Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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