at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
