Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
You brought string cheese to the strip club
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
