And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize