in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
