this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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