I'm so fucking centered right now
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
