Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Randomize
