I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize
