do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
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