Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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