I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
