YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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